It's with great excitement that I kick off the Mum's First Moments (#MumsFirstMoments) series! I'm starting with one of my own memories of my first cuddle with my youngest and across the coming weeks and months myself and guest bloggers will be sharing a varied range of '1st time' memories from all stages of motherhood.
"Are you sure?" was my response. After trying to be patient for this day to come it surprised me that my first emotion was fear and apprehension. What if I knocked a cable? What if I hurt him? What if something happened while I was holding him?
After yet another handwash and application of alcohol gel I donned the oh so attractive plastic apron and gloves as I was asked to do. Feeling very nervous, I took a seat in a comfortable chair and tried to ready myself. Although our little man was strong enough for a cuddle he was still very unwell and needed that extra barrier; it felt like a bit of a barrier between us too.
It wasn't the first cuddle I had envisaged. I thought I would have him lying on my chest, skin-to-skin, and feeling nothing but joy. I was over the moon but I was terrified as I sat covered in medical equipment with him swaddled in a blanket in my arms looking no bigger than my eldest's baby dolly.
He was so tiny and fragile but so incredibly perfect. His little blue eyes matched his Daddy's, who sat next to me stroking the fine brown hair on our youngest's head. Our baby boy looked up at us with a mixture of amazement and acknowledgement of the moment. The beeping and bustling of the NICU blurred into the background, my ears listening to his breathing and soft and steady beeps of his own machines. He was here. He was ours and he was happy. And for the first time since his difficult arrival I truly smiled and let out breath.
The 'Mum's First Moments' Blogger Series is all about embracing the first moments of Motherhood. Everything from the moment you discover you're expecting, through all those pregnancy firsts, into child-birth and those first moments as a new Mum and beyond towards the big milestone 'first moments' of bringing your little bundle home, seeing that first gorgeous smile on their faces and more.
If you'd like to get involved comment below, tweet me @shay_noble or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org for some more information :)